Written by Guest Blogger: Elizabeth Brinckerhoff
I had to crash the plane. It was
just a dream but as real as life as I flew the plane down the four-lane
highway, with traffic heading toward me. I flew just above the tree line,
barely missing the trees. I knew I had to crash the plane, there was no runway
in sight and I had no idea how to find one.
I landed the plane nose first. I
was ok, bruised, the plane heavily damaged. When I woke from the dream, I knew
that the whole incident was a metaphor for where I was in my life. I had been "failing"
retirement for a decade. I’d read articles on retirement, tried over and over
again to get myself into gear, feel productive, get in sync with a new
lifestyle. And yet, I just couldn’t get my act together. Maybe that’s because
it was an act.
I looked to others for
direction, and then realized I had to find my own way. But what was my
way? Just as in my dream, I needed to crash land and stop the repetitive
pattern of standing in place.
A friend and I walked in the park
several days a week, great exercise for the body but all our conversations
still left the unanswered question, what was I going to do now that my career,
my work identity, the demanding but comforting schedule and responsibilities of
the workplace were no longer part of my life.
I became involved in various town
activities and felt satisfaction at being able to help make things better for
others. But what about me? What was I going to do with the rest of my life,
with any time left that I would be lucky to have?
Not knowing what to do, I did what
came naturally. I organized. Until now my home, my castle, was much the same
as it was before I retired. By keeping my home intact, the home that
had existed during the years I was working professionally, I was still anchored
to the past. I needed my home to make room for my new stage of life.
It's true that when you live in an
atmosphere of things around you that are annoying or leave you with a bland
feeling, you internalize that feeling. You feel burdened, a quiet or sometimes
not so quiet pressure. This is where you live, where you come home to, where
you sleep, cook, enjoy, and play. When you leave your home to go out to the
world, you carry the feelings you have created within you. Getting rid of
things and creating space for new beginnings changes all this.
Lighten up, Open up
Go through your home, room by room.
Surround yourself with cognizance of what is meaningful to you. Save the
basics and what creates happiness within you. If you love something, keep it.
If you feel annoyed or ambivalent when you see it, pay attention to your
feelings. As organizer Marie Kondo suggests, get rid of things that don't spark
joy. Give it away, toss it, recycle it, or share it. You're smart
enough to not cut back too far.
Throughout this process, keep the
flow of energy alive. Think of the freedom you will feel when your surroundings
are fresh and meaningful, you'll open up to new things in your life. Your
creative mind will be activated, the pleasure centers stimulated. You will
"enjoy" that walk, be more alert to learning. You will "be
there", maybe for the first time in a while when you are not weighed down by
things.
That’s what I did. And now, I’m
ready to read the articles, listen, and put my own life together.
Copyright Elizabeth Brinckerhoff
11/2014
Elizabeth Brinckerhoff is an
organizational specialist who has discovered that "being organized"
just for the sake of being organized isn’t the answer.
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