Are You Retired or Unemployed?

My husband, Dave, and I went camping the last weekend in August at a ski resort in central New Hampshire. On our last day Dave went to the office to check out while I stayed outside and watched people ride the thrilling Zipline and explore the surroundings on a Segway, a super cool, two-wheeled motorized vehicle.

As I waited for Dave a friendly employee named Erin approached me. We had an interesting conversation about the resort. Then she asked the proverbial cocktail party question, “What do you do?” When I told her that I write and speak on retirement she was eager to share her story.

Erin is a retired high school physical education teacher. Like many teachers I speak with, Erin’s decision to retire was based on having maximized her pension, combined with her growing frustration with Administration. In her words, “If I could just teach, I’d do it forever.”

Erin told me she has a daughter in college who works at the ski resort in the summer. A couple years ago Erin’s daughter came home from work with a piece of paper and gave it to Erin. When Erin asked “What’s this?” her daughter said, “It’s a job application.”

Erin’s response, “I don’t need a job. I’m retired.”

Her daughter’s retort, “No you’re not. You’re unemployed.”

The verbal exchange went back and forth a few rounds until Erin agreed to complete and submit the application. Long story short, Erin got the job and believes it’s the best decision she’s made in retirement. In her role as guest associate she loves meeting new people and lending a hand with the sporting activities at the resort.

So, was Erin unemployed or was she retired?

Can she be both—unemployed and retired? What’s the difference?

Unemployed in retirement refers to a state of emotional joblessness.

If you feel a lack of direction, no compelling reason to get up in the morning, no goals or challenges to meet, or a sense of disengagement, then you may be retired AND unemployed.

Erin wasn’t looking for a job—she’s retired. But, she did need something to give her a sense of purpose, structure her time, and provide opportunities to engage with interesting and active people. Becoming employed provided what she needed. Erin could have found these benefits in paid or volunteer work. Money isn’t the issue. Life satisfaction is.

Think of employment as engagement.

Erin learned to view employment as engagement. By admitting that she needed more engagement in her retirement, she changed her thinking about employment. Retirement doesn’t always mean you don’t need a job. The best scenario may be retirement AND employment.

How about you? Is retirement keeping you from being employed—engaged? If so, now is the time to admit it and do something to change it! Just ask Erin.

Gifts are made for Dancing

I just finished reading a handbook for baby boomers written by 50 contributing authors, many who have the sort of business that I’m creating—consulting, speaking, and writing about designing the second half of our lives.

I read the book expecting to be inspired by people who enjoy the same topics that energize me. To my disappointment, that didn’t happen. Instead, my confidence nosedived after learning about the contributors’ impressive credentials, years of experience, and notable clients.

From this point I spiraled down, questioning why I even bother to have this business dream. I don’t have 25 years experience in a field. I don’t have big name clients to impress you. My website isn’t glossy and technically advanced. I‘m an author, but self-published. Compared to many people who do what I’m aspiring to do, I’m nobody.

And yet, my little book has helped many people with their decision to retire and create meaningful retirement lifestyles. Thank you notes arrive in the mail with these messages:

You packed a lot of wisdom in this little book.

Your book is one of my most treasured resources.

Your book was even better the second time around.

When I speak, heads nod as though I’m playing pinball and hitting the 500 extra points buzzer, and I’m not talking about nodding off. My message resonates. I have something to offer. Equally important, the work has something of value to offer me.

I feel most alive when I’m writing, speaking, designing workshops, and discussing retirement with someone who’s struggling with the transition. In these situations, I’m dancing. The only explanation for this success is I must be using my gifts—the unique talents woven into my DNA.

How about you? In what situations do you feel most alive? When are you dancing?

If you have an unexplainable drive to do, create, or contribute something to the world, pay attention and trust your feelings. Don’t be intimidated by other people who appear more accomplished. If you do, you’ll pass up an abundant source of happiness; you’ll miss out on the dance.

Gifts don’t need years of experience or credentials to be valuable. They are gifted, not earned. They only need to be acknowledged, trusted, and shared.  

Granted Wish

As I write, I’m vacationing in Emerald Isle, a beautiful oceanfront community along the Outer Banks of North Carolina. My family first vacationed here in 1999 when our children were 8, 10, and 12-years old. Over the years we have returned for many summers.

With each visit, one of my favorite things to do is walk along the beach and notice the names given to homes along the oceanfront. On today’s walk I passed by Off-Line, Barefoot in Paradise, Stress-Less, and LegaSea.

On these walks I make it a game to wonder about the stories behind the names. Off-Line is likely a contrast to being Online. Barefoot in Paradise and Stress-Less speak for themselves. And, I like to believe that Lega-Sea represents three or four family generations who have bonded, played, and created memories together at this beach house.

One more name stood out, Granted Wish. I had fun with this name. My guess is that the owner set a 5, 10, or even 20-year goal to someday have a house on the ocean. Poof—wish granted!

Granted Wish continued to linger in my thoughts throughout the day. I contemplated, “In the next 5 years, what will be my Granted Wish?” The house’s namesake serves as a valuable reminder that I need to take responsibility for designing my retirement lifestyle.

Now I challenge you to ask the same question:

“In the next 5 years, what will be your Granted Wish?" Dream big—then do what you need to do to make it happen.

Remember, Granted Wish didn’t receive its name by accident or magic, but it did start with a wish!

Ten-Year-Old Self

What did you love to do as a 10-year old?

Did you have a lemonade stand or a newspaper route? Did you enjoy playing a musical instrument? Perhaps you were a promising engineer, taking apart bicycles and lawnmowers to craft a wacky raft for your town’s annual competition.

At a time when you’re looking to the future and planning your retirement lifestyle, it might seem pointless to reflect on your life when you were in the 5^th grade. Ironically, remembering how you enjoyed spending your time when you were 10 may be the best place to find clues as to how to spend your time in retirement.

This idea came to me while speaking with a group of 5^th grade girls who were attending a career exploration day. In my welcoming speech, I explained that while they were going to learn from adults about a variety of careers, they might learn more by paying attention to what they love to do right now—that as adults we often learn more about ourselves by remembering what we loved to do when we were 10 years old.

To illustrate, I told the girls about the popcorn ball business I had when I was in 5^th grade. To set my business apart from the others, I carefully hand picked un-popped kernels from each batch of popcorn before mixing in the hot sugar syrup. My popcorn balls came in three colors and were individually wrapped with matching ribbons. After being in business for only a few days, students were waiting for me to get off the school bus so that they could buy my product. In fact, my popcorn balls were so popular that Mrs. Daly, my 5^th grade teacher, even asked for the recipe (but I didn’t give it to her!)

Considering the age of my audience, this analogy may have been lost in interpretation. But, for my current audience—retirees who are searching for something to be passionate about—remembering what you loved to do as a child is a great way to reconnect with your true self.

Honestly, the “popcorn ball girl” better describes my inner drive, talents, and where I derive satisfaction than the latest professional position I held as a college administrator. As I build my retirement consulting business, it is the popcorn ball girl who’s responsible for the motivation. She’s busy at work (and enjoying every minute) doing what she’s designed to do.

How about you? What did you love to do as a child? Make a list and look for clues that reveal the “real you.” Then create opportunities to reconnect with this inner child.

In the process, you’ll find a source of motivation and fulfillment that may have been dormant during the years when you were busy making a living.